i think all any of us are trying to do is be ourselves. but if i act differently around him than i do around her who am i really? and which one should feel better?

[ecstacy.]

it's too easy in this world to imagine yourself broken. a victim of change. i am saddened by how hard we are on each other. has acceptance been stricken from our vocabulary? we do not love ourselves so we cannot love each other. we imagine that others are without compassion. the greatest thing you could ever do to create your own joy is forgive yourself. lighten up a little. if you make a mistake laugh at yourself. look at any situation and pick it a part until you can find the positive. the drastic extremes we expect from ourselves are so self-defeating.

what if you could walk through this life and be changed but not affected? what if you decided to live as though you are in this world but not of it? our bodies are only vessels and we think them so real. yes. i am a shrine. i am sacred. my body is the house of god. but do i look in the mirror and define myself by what i see?

i was once this shallow. i judged on appearance because i mistook appearance for reality. i thought it held the ultimate truth. i mean "how can this be wrong if this is what i'm seeing?" i can see now how limited my perception was. i had such a pathetic opinion of myself and i projected that image onto others. the fact that i thought of the world as one way made me believe that that was the vision that others saw as well. if i focused so greatly on whether or not someone was good looking enough to be in my company couldn't others do the same? i was always scared that people were looking at me. i never wanted to be seen. and now i think if i were to see people through the eyes of god... i imagine i would crumble at the beauty. i imagine i would shatter myself with the sudden understanding of complete perfection.

i have strived to wash shallowness entirely from my system. i rarely see a person and think "she is pretty." or "he is handsome." but the incredible and mind-blowing truth i have found is that every single person i now converse with i look at and think "you are beautiful." and because i think they are beautiful, they are. and merely because i think it, not because their outward appearance has altered in any way. ah - the mind is such an amazing tool if you use it right. the thought process that we sink ourselves into will eventually lead to our destruction or to our brilliance. and the gift is : that it is your choice. that it has always been your choice.

[the gift of free-will.]